Sunday, April 3, 2011

God's timing... I know its best, I know its certain, I know He's already known it from the beginning, I know without it our whole universe would fall apart, SO, why is it such a hard lesson for me to get through my thick head!  You see, even though "I KNOW" all these things I still try to come up with my own time schedule for how this adoption process is suppose to work!  I guess I should have realized that this was totally out of my control when God asked me at 40 to return to potty training and Dora the Explorer.  But, somehow I fool myself into thinking that surely some of this must be able to be under my control and then I hear God's voice shouting...NOT!   You see I like to plan...if it were up to me I would already know who these precious kiddos were that God has mysteriously already made me fall in love with.   I would know both of their genders so I could decided which room to get ready for them, how many bunk beds to buy to fit all of our 6 children in bedrooms made for 2 :) I  would know their ages so I could start bargain shopping for clothes, toys, equipment (start looking and you'll realize how much  that stuff has changed since your kids were babes!)  I would know what their physical condition was so I could make sure I had all the best specialist lined up to help them thrive.   I would know their emotional conditions so I could get counseling on how best to help them work through the pain and turmoil they have already seen in their little lives.  I would be able to think through a schedule that might keep our lives from hitting chaos when they come home (planning a high school graduation and a preschool graduation at the same time can't be an easy task!) I would...well, you get the picture!  But then I hear God's voice again this time not shouting but, whispering " you trust Me? Do you know I have already gone before you and I have this planned just perfectly for your family both here and in Ethiopia!  Stop trying to plan, just enjoy the journey, TRUST and for now WAIT!"   Thank you, God for your perfect timing even though I'm a slow learner at times.